I have mixed emotions towards 2017. In some ways it has been the year in which I have achieved so much and in another way it has been the toughest. Never did I think I could cry so much, love so much, laugh so much and work so bloody hard!
I started the year as a 3rd year student at university stressing over my deadline dissertation and thinking of new year resolutions. And now, I am a masters student undertaking my absolute dream course but it has not been the easiest road and I have not let myself enjoy my first term as much as I could. But with the help and support from lots of lovely people, going into 2018 hopefully will be a positive one.
For starters I could not have done this year without the main lady in my life, my mum! She has been my absolute rock through-out 2017 and she is always there at the end of the phone when I have needed her, even when she has all her own worries to stress about and she is always there to give me a big hug when I have needed it. She listens to me moan constantly about uni, my weight, boys, friends and whatever else and this can be as simple as spilling my cous cous all over the kitchen floor. However, I like to think she also relies on me when she needs a moan and she knows I am always there at the other end of the line for her too. I am extremely lucky to have such a wonderful mum with who I get on with so well and we have some of the most amazing days. This year we have been to the theater, got drunk in Nottingham and have had one too many shopping trips but we both agree that retail therapy solves everything! I do not know what I would have done without her especially in these last few months, no matter how silly or upset I have been she is always there for me. So mum thank you for absolutely EVERYTHING you have done for me not just in this year but always. I cherish you lots. But lets not forget the other Paineys in my life who have big places in my hearts my dad and sister! They are also incredible who deserve big thanks too!
2017 would not be the same without my friends either! This year has seen old friends go, new friends come into my life and my absolute besties remain constant. One of my friends Eve is back in Nottingham and I could not be more pleased! And to top it off we live within minutes of each other so TV nights have happened and silly drunk nights out have returned and I love it, I cannot wait to see what 2018 brings for us both. I think we are the only two people who have pre-drinks and watch all our TV shows so we do not have to worry about catching up on them the next day and still have the best time.
However whilst some friends have returned, this year has also made me realise who my true friends really are and when you leave university you see who will continue to make the effort with you and who does not. This can sometimes come as a surprise too! I, myself have also learnt that you need to make an effort with friends, it is a two-way street. Jenna and Jess you have taught me this and even if we live miles away from each other or 5 minutes down the road it is important to make the effort and I have loved seeing you on our little catch ups every so often.
Now, I could not leave out my three amazing girls who have put up with my constant texting, funny five minutes and just my general self through 2017. Jessamyn, Mollie and Katie you have always been there for me and I appreciate that so so much, you have made me laugh when I have been my saddest and motivated me to actually get my bum into gear and work for my degree!! So whilst you are making new friends do not forget them golden oldies who will always be there for you.
Then finally, new friends! I am a bit of a chatter box when it comes to meeting new people and I have loved starting a new course and making new friends. I am still getting to know everyone but there has been some true lovelies and they know who they are!!
Sometimes you forget the importance of family and friends who love you when you are busy with your life but it is the times that knock you when you realise the importance. The worst part for me this year was when I was faced with heartbreak and I am still trying to work at this, although at the minute I am not very good at it ha ha. I have never experienced this emotion before and I cannot describe to you how I have felt over the past 4 months. It is extremely difficult to move past something you do not want to be over and if I am completely honest I have not let myself accept it, again something I continue to work on. But I do not want to put too much of how I am feeling on here as the person who needs to know how I feel knows and it is Christmas so we want to be happy little Christmas elves!
The main thing this year was too finish university. I could not have done these past three years without all these people. Time has gone so quickly at Nottingham and it only feels like I have been there a few months but in reality I have grown up so much and met some of the most amazing people who have had such huge impacts on my life here. Quick thank you also to Cole who has had the biggest impact and made my time at university one of the the happiest! He made me go into Chaucer cafe before 9am and stay to at least 4pm even though I was ready with my coat on to leave at around 2pm, but kept me there with his company and sometimes snacks. He put up with me through all the little stresses I had over nonsense and was the person who encouraged me to start the blog, go for my masters and generally motivate me to do the things that I was too shy to do. So thank you.
On a positive I have accomplished so much this year! I completed my degree and got a first class honors, something I feel is still a mistake. I graduate and did not stop smiling all day my cheeks were unbelievably sore. I traveled to Paris, somewhere I have wanted to go forever! I sung a long to Bruno Mars at the O2. Ate a bakewell tart from Bakewell. Soaked up the sun in Portugal with the simple 6. Visited Cornwall in the most amazing house. Stepped on the stepping stones in Dovedale. Sipped expensive gin and tonics on rooftops in London. Got silly drunk a number of times. Had Greggs at 3am and still remains a top memory. Moved into a new flat in Nottingham. Visited the Wirral. Live with one of my best friends. Had yummy frozen yogurts. Purchased and decorated a real Christmas tree. Went to the Moulin Rouge. Entered the under world of the secret cinema. Turnt 21. Been gifted the amazing Gucci bag. Completed a tough mudder. Had too many nights in Beirkeller. Too many hangovers. Spent too much money on coffees. Cried a lot but laughed a lot. And that is 2017 in a very small nutshell. (It is so hard to think of things you have done through-out a whole year!!)
Now looking to the future which has come round awfully quick, I am starting to think about how 2018 may progress. If I am honest the future does scare me a little at the minute with so much I wanted in the future being changed in a blink of an eye I am unsure what it holds. I had a lot of ideas I wanted to do with certain people and these little things have been shaken up! As a result I do not have much planned so far but I expect I will be very busy with my masters but I do hope it is a good year and ends better than this one. I do aim for it however to be full of learning and travel.
I have a few new years resolutions which I would like to work on. Nothing set in stone as then I will probably be down when I loose sight of them a few weeks into the year! But here they are;
Take care of myself more – this year I let myself go and did not listen to my needs at all. I have allowed my brain to overthink to an unbelievable amount and I have worried silly about uni work. So on the top of the list is to care more for myself and worry less! I want to be a carefree, fun, fashionable (lol) India.
Spend less – In short I spend way too much I need to stop.
Help more – A goal for 2018 is to help those in need more and generally be a nicer person whether this means smiling randomly at people, volunteering, raising money, complimenting or just cheering a friend up.
Health – I have always been into health and fitness but over this Christmas period already I have fallen majorly off the wagon so my aim is to get back on it but do not worry so much about how I look and how much I weigh. In February I am doing a 10k and in the future I want to aim to do the London Marathon. But I mean this is extremely ambitious so we shall see. Do not hold me to that…
So to everyone reading I wish you all the best in 2018. Love who you want and love them hard, be nice to everyone, eat that cake, make friends, travel to that place you have always wanted to go, go for that run or maybe not, do what you want to do, stay out dancing till early hours, sing in the shower, be brave, make a difference, make yourself happy and most importantly do whatever your little heart wants and go for it lets make 2018 the best so far.
Until next time,